Signs of a Healthy Love Life

 Healthy dating and marriage in Glendora, CA

Healthy dating and marriage in Glendora, CA

As a counselor in Glendora I get to help people heal their love lives daily. Everybody wants a healthy love life. Being able to feel safe and connected to another human being that you partner with long term appears to be built into our DNA. However, since a majority of the relationships we see around us end- it is hard to get a clear picture of what a healthy love life would look like. 

I thought it would be fun today to explore the signs of a healthy love life! 

  1. You are able to express your needs to your partner. Whether they are uncomfortable, or fun- you know it is ok and safe to make a request to your boyfriend, husband, or girlfriend and that you can talk through it. 
  2. You are able to identify and own your part of the problem. We are all imperfect. Crazy huh? Being in a healthy relationship doesn't mean you don't have fears, insecurities, frustrations etc. People in healthy relationships can identify and "own" when they are being a jerk, apologize, and move forward. 
  3. Your partner can identify and own their part of the problem. Does your partner ever own to being a jerk? Never? In healthy relationships, both sides can acknowledge where they are struggling and reach out to ask for support. 
  4. You partner together to solve problems. Most partners argue about household chores. Why? Because cleaning the house is a bummer! Healthy couples attack the housekeeping as an external problem- and partner together to come up with a solution that works for both people. They use this same strategy on most problems or issues that arise. 
  5. You are able to see the problems as external to your relationship. Some things in life and relationships are really, really hard. Sometimes there aren't easy answers. If you can see the problem as something external- and not the fault of your partner- you will be able to tap into the best parts of one another. Life doesn't have to be perfect for you to have a happy love life. 
  6. You don't forget about the fun. How did you feel when you first started dating your partner? Healthy relationships make time for fun, joy, and together times- even when things get rocky. Why? Because these are the times that remind you why you are with your partner and give you the energy to work through the hard stuff. 

These are a few of the top themes I see in healthy relationships. Do you notice a pattern of goodness in your relationship? Go give your partner a smooch. 

Are you noticing some areas you can work on integrating into your relationship? Get at it! 

Are you finding that you have a pattern of relationships that don't include the above? If you are in a relationship- are you and your partner in a negative spiral? Feel free to give me a call for a free 15 minute phone consultation so we can chat through options for help.